


The Supernatural Bunkmates of Lebanon, Kansas

by toreadistolive



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Chuck and Amara are my sister and I, Crack, Crack Treated Seriously, F/M, Gen, Ghosts, I am Amara, I am the last dragon, Las Vegas, M/M, Marriage Proposal, Reality TV, They Aren't, dean and cas being sneaky, kind of officeish, no sean connery you're actually the second to last dragon, seriously this is all CRACK, she is chuck, wow that got weird
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-02
Updated: 2017-05-02
Packaged: 2018-10-27 00:47:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,427
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10798224
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/toreadistolive/pseuds/toreadistolive
Summary: Next Week on the Supernatural Bunkmates of Lebanon, Kansas…Dean and Cas keep finding new places to do the deed. Will they eventually be caught? Sam wants to propose to Eileen, but will a ghost from the past threaten to break them apart? Meanwhile…Rowena is caught cheating in Vegas and is arrested. And Crowley sets up an intervention for Rowena about all her sugar daddies. Also, Mary and Arthur have an announcement to make…are Sam and Dean ready to call Ketch Daddy? Or could there possibly be another Winchester on the way? Find out Thursday at 8/7c on the CW.





	The Supernatural Bunkmates of Lebanon, Kansas

**Author's Note:**

> Okay so if you have ever watched reality TV you know they do those interviews with the person just by themselves. That is what the bold parts are. The italicized parts are an announce. If you are confused I can explain it better.

_Next Week on the Supernatural Bunkmates of Lebanon, Kansas…Dean and Cas keep finding new places to do the deed. Will they eventually be caught? Sam wants to propose to Eileen, but will a ghost from the past threaten to break them apart? Meanwhile…Rowena is caught cheating in Vegas and is arrested. And Crowley sets up an intervention for Rowena about all her sugar daddies. Also, Mary and Arthur have an announcement to make…are Sam and Dean ready to call Ketch Daddy? Or could there possibly be another Winchester on the way? Find out Thursday at 8/7c on the CW._ *screen goes black*

“Well that is just stupid.” Amara says putting the remote on the table.

“What? What’s stupid about it?” Chuck says with a mouthful of popcorn.

“Ugh, must you always talk with your mouth full?” Amara says wrinkling her nose, “Mary is not pregnant, and the episode was filmed months ago, and if she was it would be all over the news right know, or at least we would have seen a baby bump. I just hate it when the previews tease something making you think one thing, and it turns out that it’s not even addressed in the episode!”

Chuck hums, “Well, I guess your right about that, although they could be hiding it? Remember John? We didn’t even know about his son till season 4. But, I agree, I think it will mostly be about Sam and Dean’s reaction to the mother’s new beau, since we know that Ketch and Dean were seen drinking last.”

“You actually bought that copy of TMZ, didn’t you?” Amara accused “You’re too obsessed with this show.” Amara began picking up the Cheese Puffs, Taco Bell, and Dr. Pepper scattered all over the coffee table.

“Sssuurrreeee! And you aren’t? You have every picture of Dean possible, you spend hours on Ebay trying to find products that either have his signature on them or that he has sniffed, licked, tasted, touched, kicked, brushed, or breathed on. Face it you’re just as obsessed as me, probably more!”

Amara drops the dishes into the sink with a clatter, “You know what? I don’t have to take this. I can enjoy my shows alone and how I want to. Goodnight,” she said as she stormed off to her bedroom.

Chuck signed as he looked around at all the dirty dishes and trash everywhere, “looks like I’m cleaning up tonight. Great. I need a beer.”

* _One week later*_

Chuck was sitting on the couch with a white shirt on, blue boxers, black socks, feet propped up on the table, and Chinese take out on his lap when Amara came in.

“Move,” she ordered.

“No,” Chuck said with a smirk.

“Whatever,” Amara said plowing through his legs. She grabbed the remote and an egg roll and sat down.

“Hey, you can’t do that.” Chuck retorted reaching for the remote.

“Just did. And cover yourself up, I don’t want to see the dragon out of the castle. Don’t you ever wear those sweatpants I bought you?” Amara asked putting her hand up to cover up Chuck’s lower half.

“No, this is more freeing.”

“You’re so gross,” Amara said changing the channel and, and grabbing another Chinese take out container. “Aren’t you going to leave? I told you last week, I wanted to be alone when watching my show.”

“It’s my couch! I invented it! Besides, why waste electricity when we’re both going to be watching the same show?”

“Well, you can sit there but be quiet, I don’t want to know your even there.” Amara says as the theme songs starts to play.

“Good morning Sam, Eileen, Mom.” Dean says has he walks into the kitchen in his dead guy robe, followed by Cas.

**Dean: So, Cas and I have recently gotten together and were trying to keep it private, as it’s still a knew thing, and we’re not yet ready for other people to found out yet.**

Dean hands Cas a cup of coffee and they stare at each other, a small smile playing on Dean’s lips. Sam nudges Eileen and she glances over.

**Sam glares into the camera: It’s obvious. It’s been obvious for about nine years now. The pining, the stares, the smiles, the longing, the depression when one of them is hurt or dead, it’s been so obvious for so long that I CANNOT BELIEVE THEY-**

**Eileen grabs Sam’s arm and pulls him back to his chair: Deep breaths, Sam, deep breaths. I think what Sam means is that we have known they would get together for a while now, and that we are just waiting on them to tell us. But (as she squeezes Sam’s arm) we are going to what until they’re good and ready to tell us.**

“So, Eileen found us a case,” Sam says to Dean as he munches on his cereal.

“Oh yeah, how bad is it? Do we need to be on the road soon?” Dean says with his mouth full. Cas hands him a napkin.

“No, I think Eileen and I can handle it. It all points to just a simple ghost. We should be back in a day or two.”

Mary nods and looks over at Cas. Cas is whispering something into Dean’s ear, and Dean’s ears slowly start to turn red.

“I’m going to go look for a case for then. Good luck Sam and Eileen, see you soon.” Cas says as he is leaving the kitchen.

“Yeah I think I’m going to match up some socks, so, see you later. Bye, mom can you,” Dean points to his barely eaten bowl of cereal.

Mary glares at Dean but nodes.

“Thanks, mom. Love you!” Dean says as he kisses her on the cheek. As he leaves he bumps into Crowley in the doorway.

“Watch you, Winchester!” Crowley shouts back.

**Crowley: Honestly, squirrel and feathers aren’t being very subtle about it. Abd I should know, Dean and I did have that one summer together. I know all of Dean’s tells. Just the other day I was looking for a hanger for my new Armani suit and I was passing by the laundry room when I heard some suspicious noises. When I confronted Dean about it, he claims it was the dryer breaking down again. But I know that dryers don’t whisper ‘Right there, right there, ooohh, yeah, right there.’**

“So have they admitted it to anyone,” Crowley asks sitting down. Mary and Sam shake their heads and Eileen signs ‘Not yet’.

**Mary: I hope Dean admits to him and Cas being a couple soon. I’m just afraid that he feels that I won’t approve, and that’s why he is not telling anyone. But, that is not true, I already consider Castiel one of my boys. And I love all my boys, even when I notice that there is an empty bottle of lube crumpled up in the corner of the firing range.**

“Alright, well Eileen and I better get packing if we are going on that hunt, so see ya later,” Sam says as he grabs Eileen’s hand and they leave.

**Sam: So I have been meaning to propose to Eileen for a while now. I purchased the ring months ago, but I haven’t found the right time to do it. I’m hoping after this hunt, I can find a nice place ask her.**

“Do you think the moose, is about to get his antlers on straight and propose?” Crowley asks Mary.

“I hope so.” Mary says.

 **Mary: I’m very proud of my sons and all they have accomplished and I love them with all my heart. But the day Sam dragged Dean and I to the mall to buy a ring was one of the longest days of my life. He went over every single ring and would not make up his mind. I honestly thought Dean was going to explode from boredom. I finally had to tell Sam that back in my day, we didn’t even propose with rings, and that whatever he picked Eileen would love. We were out of the store with a ring 10 minutes later…if only I had said that** **7½ hours earlier.**

Sam walks into Eileen’s room, where she is zipping up her duffle bag. Sam signs to her, ‘Are you ready?’ and Eileen nods. Sam looks around.

**Sam: Eileen is a very neat person. Her room is even cleaner than mine. Every time I go in there, it seems likes things are more organized and put away.**

Sam and Eileen leave the room, and Eileen turns off the light.

**Eileen sighs and rolls her eyes. She then begins to sign: So for months now I have been trying to get Sam and me to the next step. I’m not trying to pressure him into marriage or anything, but I’m trying to at least get us into the same room. So every time now that Sam and I spend the night in Sam’s room, I leave my clothes or a little something from my room into Sam’s room. Hoping that Sam notices that I am slowly moving into his room. I don’t think it’s working.**

Sam suddenly stops and looks at Eileen. Eileen gives him a questioning look before Sam grabs her hands and starts running towards the garage. Once they are in the car, Sam turns to Eileen. “We were passing by one of the closets, and I heard Cas’s voice saying something about Dean’s tongue.”  Sam shudders just thinking about it.

Eileen smiles, “You know they are eventually going to get caught, and then they will be forced to acknowledge what’s been going on.”

**Eileen: I didn’t want to tell Sam about the weird liquidy stain I found on the telescope in the observatory when we were cleaning. I think he was traumatized enough.**

“Well, I don’t want it to be me that walks in on them. Maybe I should invest in some ear plugs.”

Eileen giggles, “Then you can be like me.”

**Sam: At least Eileen and I keep it classy and only have sex in the bedrooms. And yes, I said bedrooms that means yours too, Dean.**

Back at the bunker, Mary is packing.

“Going somewhere Mother Winchester?” Crowley asks.

Mary gives Crowley an unimpressed look, “Yes, I’m going to visit a friend.”

“Okay well have fun then.”

**Crowley: Ever one must think I am dumb. I know what everyone is up to. Mary is going to visit a “friend” and I just hope I’m here when moose and squirrel find out about this “friend”.  But in the meantime, I am having mother issues of my own.**

Rowena shouts, “Whooo! Vegas here I come darlings!”

**Rowena: I have been entered into the National Poker Tournament. I’m here with my latest beau, Rob. I have become quite good at gambling. But, it’s probably because I cheat.**

As Sam unpacks at the motel, Eileen informs Sam about the case, “So six people have been killed. All newly engaged couples. I did some research and the only person who fits the memo is Sharon Green. She was a premed students who was engaged then her boyfriend cheated on her with stripper. Looked at first like a murder, but was ultimately ruled a suicide.”

“Wow, you’ve done a lot of research. So, now we just have to find her bones.”

Eileen shook her head, “She was cremated. So, she is mostly likely tied to an object.”

“Well, then let’s get to work.”

**Rowena: I have arrived in Las Vegas and the tournament is going well. I’m in the lead of course, and nobody has suspected a thing.**

Rowena goes all in when suddenly and a guy in a white suit and two police officers in tow.

“Rowena, you’re under arrest for cheating and fraud. Take her.”

Rowena shouts as she struggles to get the big men off her, “What is the meaning of this?” they place her in handcuffs and she tries to use her magic, but she can’t. She realizes these are handcuffs made specifically for witches. “You bastard!” Rowena screams as they haul her away.  

Cas and Dean emerge from their bedroom.

“Where is everyone?” Dean asks. Cas just shrugs as they make their way down to the kitchen. As the grabs some snacks, Cas starts playing footsie with Dean.

“Cas you keep doing that and I’m going to have to retaliate. You know my feet are ticklish.” Dean says.

Cas smirks, “Yes I know, I know every part of your body that is ticklish. Would you like me to demonstrate?”

“Cas, if you start tickling me, I’m going to get you back.”

“I’m not tickles under any circumstances.”

“Oh yeah? We’ll see about that!” Dean gets up and starts chasing Cas back to the bedroom.

**Mary: Arthur Ketch is man I’ve been seeing. He is a British Men of Letters, and we just connect.**

Arthur gets some chocolate covered strawberries out of a fridge. His lower half is blurred and he brings them over to Mary who is lying in bed.

“Mary, I know we have a history now, and I was just wondering, when are you going to tell your boys and bunkmates about us?” Arthur asks as he feeds Mary a strawberry.

**Mary: Truth be told I was hoping the boys would never find out, but I know that’s not realistic. Plus, I’m sure Crowley already suspects something.**

“How about when everyone gets back? We can tell them. And, maybe, you could move in?” Mary asks shyly. Arthur smiles.

**Arthur: I’m quite happy Mary wants to bring our relationship out into the open. I think her sons need a male role model in their lives, and why not me?**

Sam and Eileen arrive at the pawn shop.

**Eileen: Sam and I figured out that all the engaged couples had Sharon’s original ring, so she must be tied to that. Apparently, after every death the ring keeps getting sold to a pawn shop.**

“Sam? What do you think about marriage?” Eileen asks tentatively.

“Well, to be honest, there was a period in my life that I thought I never would get married. But, then I met you and Eileen stop.” Sam then gets down on one knee. “Eileen this isn’t how I wanted to do it, but I love you and I’ve wanted to do this for months. Will you ma-” At that moment Sam gets thrown across the room and smashes into the display case of all the jewelry.

“Sam!!!” Eileen shouts. A ghost then appears by Eileen. Eileen shoots a rock salt bullet at the ghost and it vanishes. “Sam, burn the ring!”

“I’m trying! I’m trying!” Sam shots as he sifts through all the glass and other jewelry trying to find the right ring to burn.

“You will never be happy! You will cheat on you and you will die!” the ghost says.

“Not happening, bitch!” Sam screams as he lights the ring on fire and the ghost burst into flames.

**Sam: This really isn’t how I wanted to propose to Eileen. I wanted something romantic not having a ghost scream at your face your relationship isn’t going to last.**

“Sam?’ Eileen says helping Sam to stand, “did you mean it when you asked me to marry you?’

“I did. Eileen, will you become a Winchester?” Sam smiles.

“Yes!” Eileen joyful says as she leaps onto Sam and starts kissing him.

**Eileen: When I brought up the subject of marriage, I just wanted to see what Sam was thinking about us, and to see if he wanted to move into the same bedroom. And now we’re engaged!**

“I’ll get you for this Titus! If it’s the last thing I do!’ Rowena screams from her jail cell.

**Rowena: Titus was this warlock who I knew way back in the day, and I took away is powers because he killed my cat. He recognized me and had me arrested, because he knew I must have been cheating, hence the handcuffs.**

“Well, well, well Mother, you’ve gotten yourself in a bit of a pickle,” Crowley says as appears out of nowhere.

“Shut it, Fergus, and let me out!” Rowena demands.

**Crowley: My original intent for coming to Vegas was to set up an intervention for my mother. She’s been having this problem of letting sugar daddies into her life, and it’s not been good for her. But, now that she is literally being held captive, I thought this would be the perfect opportunity to have a little chat.**

“In a minute, mother, I first want to talk to about your recent life choices,” Crowley begins.

“What?” Rowena asks perplexed.

“I’m talking about Ben, Louis, and more recently Rob. All your sugar daddies, all your boy toys, all your fiancées. It must stop mother.” Crowley explains.

Rowena scoffs, “And why do you care Fergus? You’ve never cared! You just don’t want to have to call anyone daddy.”

“I care because, after everything goes wrong, I’m left holding while you’re crying and your heart is broken. I care because you’re family and my mother. Look around, Rob isn’t here, but I am.”

Rowena begins to cry, “That is the sweetest thing you have ever said to me. Can we go home now?”

“Of course.” Crowley says and they disappear.

**Cas: Dean and I have been engaged in a sexual relationship for a little bit now. Dean is a very generous lover, always willing to give more than he takes.**

“Where is everyone?” Dean asks, Cas just shrugs. Suddenly the bunker door opens and Sam and Eileen are walking in.

“Eileen what a huge diamond you have on your finger,” Cas observes.

“Well, the moose finally did it.” Crowley says popping behind them with Rowena.

“Jeez, Crowley, warn a guy before do that, you going to give me a heart attack.’ Dean breathes out.

“Ignore him, and, yes, I proposed and Eileen said yes!” Sam explained. Cheers, hugs, kisses, and congratulations were spread all around before the bunker’s door opened again with Mary and Ketch holding hands.

“Um, mom, what’s going on?” Sam says quietly.

“I think you better sit down. All of you.” Mary says.

As everyone sits down, Mary cleared her throat. “I know this will come as a shock to you, well most of you” (she glances at Crowley) “but Arthur and I have been seeing each other for a while now, and he would like to move into the bunker.”

“What?! How long has this been going on? When were you going to tell us? And it’s suddenly _Arthur_?” Dean snaps.

“Dean, please calm down.” Marry says.

“Yes, son, calm down. And how is this any different from what you’re doing with your angel?” Arthur states.

“Don’t call him son!” Sam bites, “Dean, calm down”.

“Please let me explain. I’ve been lonely, I have needs, just like you do. Rowena understands, and Arthur is very nice guy if you get to know him.” Mary explains.

“Don’t drag me into this, dearie,” Rowena says putting her hands up. Dean’s face just keeps getting redder and redder.

“I can’t believe you’re sleeping with enemy!” Dean shuts wrenching his arms free and Sam and Cas.

**Cas: Dean was very irate when he found out about his mother having coitus with the British man. I think I might need to give him a blow job to calm him down.**

Dean storms off with Cas following right behind him, while Sam and Eileen look shocked and a little disappointed at Mary and Ketch. On the couch, Crowley and Rowena share a bag of popcorn.

“Well that could have gone better,” said Ketch.

_Coming next week on the Supernatural Bunkmates of Lebanon, Kansas…the aftermath of the shocking revelation. Can Mary and Arthur ever be together now that everyone knows and doesn’t approve? Sam and Eileen begin wedding planning. Dean thinks he has an STD, and is afraid to tell Cas. Did he forget that Cas is an angel?  Also, Rowena and Crowley go to boot camp for mother-son healing. Will they survive the ropes course, or will the ropes course break their fragile bond for good? Found out next week… *Screen goes black*_

“Wow,” Chuck and Amara both say. They look at each other and start screaming.

“I can’t wait for next week!” Amara squeals.

“Me too! Want to binge watch the whole series in preparation?” Chuck delightedly asks.

“Uh duh,” says Amara as she turns back on the TV and the theme song Carry on My Wayward Son begins to play.

**Author's Note:**

> Comments and kudos if you like it, because if not i think I'm going to delete this. I'm not very good with crack so, let me know!


End file.
